These days of confusion,

you are probably curious about the bouncing castle. Yes it is ours for the project.. but that is not the point right now, becaouse i cant bounce of my problems.....

Lately I am talking to a lot of friends, who are all in a vey confused moment, like myself. We are nothing else, but millions of people out here, dealing with our own issues, and no one and nothing are excluded.

How the peep, did we manage to make it so difficult for our selves?

Today.
To be a princess means, I suppose to be bigger then yourself. To be your own lawyer, to realise you have been treated wrongly, but not treat other wrongly as they have treated you. To rise up and say, fine, I fucked up, but damn it in hell I will make it right. To allow people to fail, to value failure for the growth it gives.

I have never been a princess other then in a pretty costume. I have kept my finest skirts on tight, worn the crown, but seldom in my life have I been a more princess then what I feel like today. This is a good day to wear pink, to wear our failure like a crown, to love the parts that we are shamed about and to stand damn strong when the hurricane comes. This is not really about performing a princess, it is about being one. One of the good ones.

God Save the Princess

I am in Athens, and beyond all other things then blogging, i should prepare for our creation that is premiering here tomorrow… But then again, I would never forgive myself if I would not comment on the extension of the long line of princesses.. More important, one from the outside, one to make us all remember, that everyone has the right to dream.

The royal line of England is something quite different from my own here in Norway. Even in Greece the royal line is something different, that is, it is no more then a vague memory followed by the sad chapters of war.

To me personally, UK is the concept itself when it comes to Royalties, everything after UK seems to be just a shadow of the old days, when crown and glitter really mattered. Princesses has as we all know evolved from trading product of peace and land to strong business woman… But some how, we will never be quite finish with the melancholy tears followed by the echo of “Yes, I do”, the dresses and so on so forth… UK is a shining example of this.. Keeping traditions ongoing and strong.. God Save the queen, yes, but for today and today only and perhaps only on this Blogg… God save the Princess.

If I Was A Princess By: Sandy Williams

If I was a princess I’d first take a few minutes to revel in my new found power to get other people to do stuff for me. I now have, within my beautifully bejeweled hand, the hearts and minds of millions of pre-teen girls and boys. These impressionable youngsters will concede to my every will and desire because I’m hot and popular and maybe / probably in distress and / or danger. I swim in my new found power like Scrooge McDuck in his money vault! Girls want to be me. Boys want to get with me. There has never been a more deeply motivated bunch. Check out any given fairytale or grade school classroom. Popular, hot, distressed girls get people to do seriously sociopathic stuff. See: The Legend of Zelda, Orpheus, Heathers, that really hot girl that sat next to me in 7^th grade science class.

If I was a princess I’d dress the part. No more of this demure, woman of the people crap. I want serious taffeta. I want pearls and corsets and all that junk. And tiaras. There would be a hell of a lot more tiaras; it’s not a hat, it’s not a head band, it’s the only really reliable way to get diamonds to stick in your hair. Being not quite Princess, I’ve tried just combing the diamonds in, I’ve tried affixing them permanently like little hair plugs for the rich and balding but nothing makes my locks go BLING like a tiara. See: Queen Alexandra of Russia, drag queens taking it to the next level, my Halloween costume as Miss. Saudi A-Labia circa 2001.

If I was a princess I’d eat eggs every day for every meal. Because nothing says; ‘I’m lord-ette of the land’ like consuming an animal’s unborn. Caviar, roe, quail eggs, veal eggs, fiddleheads, the whole lot. Animal Kingdom, you’re my bitch and to prove it I’m going to tuck in to a big ol’ portion of your potential offspring. The key word is potential. I could eat your already living young and that would be a statement and all but that’s after they’ve been born and you’ve gotten to know them a bit. Sure it’s bad-ass and royal to eat baby cows and pigs and ducks and ferns but not bad-ass enough because maybe the kid’s been born and he’s cute and all but he’s a pain in the ass and doesn’t sleep through the night and has his grandmother’s beak and his mother’s love of spending money that’s not hers and maybe it’s not so bad that he’s ‘taken for a walk’ in the middle of the night and doesn’t come back. Maybe you’re sad for a few days but get over it as it’s always easier to live with the ghost of ‘a wonderful innocent boy that was taken before his time’ than ‘an ungrateful, elephantine little twerp that won’t move out of the manger and still expects me to pay his cell phone bill’. See: The Bible, Kashrut, untalented sons and daughters of legitimately good artists that try and make a go in the industry.

If I was princess I’d organize all of the NGOs working in Haiti. Really, it’s a fucking problem over there and no one’s really doing shit about it. Tons of groups working with overlapping mandates, demands and desires doing their best but without any kind of infrastructure, oversight or communication between them. It’s a mess and we really have to do something about it.

If I was a princess I’d be sure to marry someone from another country that maybe we were at war with or maybe were just having issues with so we could, you know, smooth things over and assure good communication and prosperity and non-aggression and such. Lets bring back the old school diplomacy; I’m fourteen and hot and you’re fifteen and hooked up and we get together because my dad and your dad want to make sure our countries don’t fuck with each other so much but fuck with the British even though seven years from now we’ll wish we hadn’t gotten involved at all and in the mean time I get to sleep with a ton of other dudes and love to party and spend all the money that should go to keeping the country together on like cakes and Converse and stuff. Yeah, that was some serious statesmanship. See: Marie Antoinette (the movie), Marie Antoinette (the Wikipedia article), Ben Affleck and J-Lo and the disastrous nuptials surrounding the movie Gigli.

If I was princess I’d have a four poster bed with gauzy drapes. It’s like a room within a room! It’s like a pillow fort, but for girls! Good for keeping mosquitoes out! Hides unsightly blemishes when you’re lying in the bed all naked and seductive and someone’s standing outside the bed considering your nakedness and there are candles and swooshy music and you’re maybe a little concerned about your cellulite even though you’re fourteen and he’s only fifteen but you really really have to make a baby like TONIGHT or else both of your counties are going to, I dunno, explode and starve and tumble in to revolution. See: Madonna and Willem Dafoe having gross candle sex in Body of Evidence.

If I was a princess I’d give my life so that unicorns could exist. It’s the penultimate sacrifice for a real blue blooded princess to make. Because really, what is a princess but a unicorn in human form? She represents all the possibility, all the dreams, all the magic of a one horned horse but she happens to be shaped like a girl. Everyone knows that the only way to bring unicorns back to this earth is for a real live princess to throw herself in to an active volcano singing Iron Maiden’s Run To The Hills. The Iron Maiden song ensures the unicorns aren’t the pink pussyfooted ones that prance about on rainbows but are the streamlined killing machine kind who’s lust for blood and power is rivaled only by it’s obsession for sparkles and hugs. See: Narwhals, Meg Ryan in Joe Vs The Volcano, Madonna having gross candle sex in Body of Evidence.

Miss-shaped content

Dear Princess.

Tonight I am wondering what it is to have it all... to be fully content, to posses slightly more then you can bother to handle. Content to that level, that you whisper very low to yourself, -"this is the definition of amazing and i am about to burst." ...and so you pop! Poff!

I have never met such a person, -which actually popped. I have met people popping for various reasons, but non of them where out of content." I am not sure if content can make you pop". I know eggs and hamsters explode if kept in a heated micro oven for too long, but not out of content.

This might be just a mortal concern, and content should probably not kill you. Better perhaps to put you at ease, -a slow and endless loving embrace of chocolate covered death. That is how i want my content to come through.

What does a content Princess do differently from a content hamster?

What are the thoughts of a content farmer?

...and some people would not recognise content if it jumped up and bit them.

Dead stray, long legged mountain dog. Was his thoughts.

He carried them as an aborted new born towards the bin, where pulse had just started and soon was to rest. Days had been passing in a similar series of thought, and for no misshaped reason at all, it made him content.

Good night

Today I blog, tomorrow we dance.

This is one of those days, and you probably think, “oh no, not one of those days.”. But in fact so is the situation. Mary had her twins; in if not by know, dreadfully very soon… What else? Wiki- leaks the truth on that there has been speculations to dump the royal family of Britain, as the head of common wealth. Little new on this front, in fact too long has it been, that heads where rolling through the streets at the feet of an angry mob. I want an angry mob for my birthday.

But something has changed for the better, at least here about up in the northern Kingdom as the Arts Council have, plodded their tiny heads together for the sake of common good and granted gold. To whom you may ask? Well of brightly course to the sake of rightfully portraying princesses, and by whom… unforgettable myself.

Now that curtains are pulled aside, I want to thank the princesses who has in silent pulled the strings of admiration, glory and eternal …. () Now I am getting ahead of myself, because I still do not know whom you are, but by all means, I am grateful for your need of attention…

To the horses…..!!!!

Where does my quest go from here?

Which ship should I sail on and will you stand by my side?

How should I approach you, will you dance disco if I ask?

How do you change the world, and how can I help?

What pink is your favourite colour, and what do you hate about your people?

Have you killed for beauty, or dribbled death down the grass?

So many questions and such long time to figure them all out…

As always, I am looking forward for you acquaintance.

Kind regards Rudi Skotheim Jensen, jester at you side.

Ps, I have friends to.

Prinsesse Martha Louise på Radioen om prinsesser

http://sverigesradio.se/sida/arkiv.aspx?programid=3421&artikel=869966

braking the waves

In times of strength, in times of glory, in times of tears, what to wear?
I am not risking having your beauty secrets shattered across the Internet, but occasionally I have the slight sensation that you dress up better, then how you actually feel. This might be a problem. Now I am only trying to be a friend, and by friend’s law, we can easily have a slumber party and still get along. I think you look spectacular non-the-less, half naked or half undressed.

I sometimes simply fear that you censor yourself when you should scream, that you keep yourself locked away in the tower, with only a mirror, a draftee window but no shower… you smell bad close up, but look grate from a far.

If you want to learn to dance, you train your feet skills, and if you want to be skilled in emotional conversation, you get a shrink. I probably need both, and I can break the ice for the both of us.

Well.. I just wanted you to know that you are not alone.

She made you a song....

Dear, simply all of you!!!! To show you my most deepest apology for restless nights and curious thoughts, i have embraced my thoughts into this song. I would be gratefull if replyed in a note, although, if you do it only by thought, i am still very hounered... (but my followers on this page don't think i have any real princess friends)

oh what to do. many kisses from Rudi.

At the long end of the pink trumpet.

I find myself going through a rather harsh part or period of my life. Life, love, ambitions versus reality of my situations, what can I obtain, -at the risk of what? How come I visual and strategise my life, and then try to obtain this vision? your excelency, :-) I will watch my both tongue and words carefully, because as we both know and has agreed upon, this page is not dedicated to me.

To point the pink gun back in your direction. Un-doubtfully you will have been through the same, if not worse, if not under more pressure, with more pink and more illusions of the things that you would like to do for mankind… against, reality of things that you are available to perform.
How do you handle those days, when you realised you-yourself had gotten the better of you. By the end of those days, how did you deal with it…Do you cope with depression? Or can you hire someone to do this for you? Do you hire people to fight for your ideals, for world peace and justice when you are depressed in bed or healing out on a family picnic?

Looking forward to your answer.
Yours truly, humble Rudi

I am so sorry

Dear Princesses, it has been days, if not weeks followed up by countless miserable moths… that I have not written a single word…and you might ask yourself, -Bastard, How could you, you promised!!!?

And I, the skinny farmer I was born and am, have no real answer that could possible restore my honour. But your highness, it is my privilege to continue writing about my inner-most-deepest-thoughts about you, so you can at least see by far or by accidently browsing this page, that I still care.. I was made to care..!!

Perhaps to day, a day a little bit more remarkable then any other, I am you closer, and can do you a percentage of good. From today and till the mid of December I am a resident in Denmark and will be living in “PRINCESS” Street nr 84.

I do invite you to pass by for tea, or any other activities you would find entertaining. Even if you ignore me, a loving flirt, I will keep an extra eye on your activities here in Denmark, so do not mind to make a scene every now and then..

Yours truthfully
Rudi

performing the power

May I first take this opportunity to congratulate the newly wed, may life be both long and as far a comfortable goes, it is all within the tittles. Personally I had a spectacular afternoon watching Internet live, drinking champagne with strawberries and watching all the comments popping up on the site of SVT.

It was splendid; it was all fun and games until it came to my attention, that the monarchy does not at all turn a blind eye to the difference between us commoners and themselves. –and in certain situations they should not, it is just that this one I can not get my head around. When A Crown Prince chose’s his wife she naturally becomes Crown Princesses and from there on climbs to the queen title. Whilst young Prince Daniel now, will forever be a prince and She, the Queen, and her becoming a ruling queen is a phenomenon that only changed in 1980 in Sweden.

How did power come to be? If I attempt logically to mount the question, I would conclude humans as flock-animals, and from here on see natures strongest as the obvious leading character. This would mean a male character back then, when requirement was physical brute, and strength and violence need to hold a position. In later history, power was passed on in blood and in the case of dictatorship, still is. Blood has also been used to strengthen political positions and at one point in history it could all be seen as an international inbreed ballet, but that is another project.

But in Sweden’s political focus on “equal rights” -for woman mainly, there is a double moral; You are invited for tea, but only as an guest. You are part of the family, though only as an observer. You are welcomed to the country, when you have learned the language, and you are welcomed to the castle but only as a peasant.

Dear Daniel, this all matters, I assume, very little to you. I imagine love came in forehand and so it should. But this is not really about you, it is that which you are now part of and presenting, a moral right for a equal people.


PS. I love your speech.

PS2. i found a song about ou as King

v

royal-princess-royal-scandal-sad-life Princess Margareth

http://scandalouswoman.blogspot.com/2008/01/royal-princess-royal-scandal-sad-life.html

TRUE LOVES KISS

With the last months unbearable tense events concerning Madeleine, and NOW, her sister, on the brinks of stepping into those royal ranks of marriage, the plot is thickening…. How do you sleep at night, whom can you trust?

I have curiously devoted time, God knows why -if such a being exists, if so, he must be ludicrous in creating me. But time is however being devoted to this, singular quest called princesses. I tried to put my fingers on it now for some time, but alas, they, are randomly circling all part of the skies, very much like a seagull drunk on absinthe.
Now, I have handled my depression with a selection of movies, princess movies. After suffering through bad acting though an entertaining plot in Disney’s “Enchanted”, I learned that first sighted love, have stopped existing in films. And there we are….. This, should hopefully give reality and future generations a chance of less frustration.

BUT, True loves kiss, how does one find it? – If you are, and once again please imagine yourself, a princess. How can you be sure that the man you are dating is not holding your hand because of the exotic idea, entitled prince? Something tremendous is hiding in that shadow. I am a man, I know how this works, in early years, we are far from the cleanest of souls and will bend easily for profit.

So, princes, how do you single out the bad ones from the good ones.. Is there a naughty and nice list involved? Do you go under cover?

Yours truly
Rudi

Public decisions make a princess take decisions publicly.

I find myself returning slightly sooner to the “love case” taking place in Sweden’s capital, the intentionally accounted for. The occasion is rooted in a metro magazine, a column in fact, that has that keen and reflecting eye over the entitled situation, which got me blogging….
Anders Pihlblad, presents some curious and well chosen words on the media reactions. He says; “As the Royal family is our “ideal” family, we are stirred and curious when something un-ideal is taking place. We find this interesting as the Monarchy has lost its political influence, and because of this, there is pretty much only one task left for them to conduct; producing children. This is why, in media, the sex life of the royalties becomes interesting”

Meanwhile in the East. The Indonesian Teen model Manohara, whom married to the Malaysians Princes Tengku Muhammad Fakhry Petra (at the age of 14, -now 18’teen), is inspiring new depths between those old national wounds of Indonesia and Malaysia.
Manohara (meaning “Hart theft”) claims the Malaysian Prince kidnapped her during a pilgrimage, and for nine months abused her in all classical ways possible. Last year she managed to escape with the help of both her mother and the American embassy. When the press published the cover stories, Indonesians started protesting. In Jakarta, it was reported riots outside the Malaysian embassy. Both the Governments have withdrawn politically from the case, and stated that this is a private affair between husband and wife.

In her home country, she publicly appears as the tragic heroine, badly treated by an obsessed prince. While in Malaysia, she is considered the little devil liar, hunting for fame and glory, and orchestrated by her mother.

My point is that, even if the Prince did these things or not, it is now out in the public. Even if Jonas did cheat or not, it is still out in the public, and the public point of view seems to matter a grate deal to royalties as royal decisions are often made to keep the myth of the ideal portrait in harmony. -Which I find tricky, as the ideal of royalty is also quite a myth.

Fredrik V of Denmark-Norway (1746-66) ruled from the bottom of his bottle and was preferably surrounded by prostitutes, -while by doing so. Christian VII of Denmark was known as insane with sadistically preferences, and we are not even getting started on France and Spain in those days…

Returning to Manohara. She is now playing in a famous TV series, about a young woman who is abused by her husband. She is also giving “expensive” lectures, and the documentary about her adoption is running continuously on Indonesian Television. The Prince is not giving any interviews.

its royalties, its human..

Tiny books of history explain us that it was 88 years time since last cancelation of a royal engagement, here in Scandinavia. Details concerning the newly split Swedish couple are nothing of my concern, as those discussions can easily fly about with one less voice. As well, concerning anyone’s personal love life, there is a refined fine line between common curiosity and personal profit.

In 1922, Crown prince Fredrik of Denmark (23) was engaged with his cousin, Princess Olga of Greek and Denmark. A combination of blood itself that created international headlines. These where also the end of times, when marrying outside the royal circles, was considered quite reckless. The engagement did however not last for long (3 years), and in those days like in ours, speculations under a lot less twittered attention, closer to royal professionalized eavesdroppers, to spread the word. In this case it was also the princess whom broke off the engagement, and the theories are, how to put this, book thick.

It is quite clear to me, that little have changes within humanity when it comes to the power of knowledge, and how reckless we tend to use it. Human error happens everywhere and only ignorance would tell you otherwise.

Jonas and Madeleine, in between all of this, just don’t give a shit about the rest of us, you do whatever you need to do. Yours Supportably, Rudi.

The new blood in the blue blood, a portrait.

Finding myself in Japan is also unquestionable confronting the royal monarchy’s story of today’s princesses and coming queen to be, on what’s hot and what’s aught to be given a second thought.
Firstly it seems, if am so brave to make such a distinction, that in all marriages where one are wed into a family, to the title of princess I remark, comes at the prize of risks, and is as unnatural as riding a unicycle, to ones own funeral.

As the eldest daughter of Hisashi Owada, a senior diplomat, and President of the International Court of Justice, Princess Masako worked in Japanese Ministry of Foreign Affairs, side by side with her father. Indeed a well educated creature, already fluid in English, frensch and with good knowledge of Russian and Spanish… with political interests, for the future of Japan.

In the briefest of seconds, imagine the lucky star being you, at the admirable tunnel of shining light and possibility, and I ask; how much would you sacrifice, at the equilibrium between love and career?

To the faith that awaits the one whom chooses the kiss of a frog, comes a remarkable responsibility. But everything in its order and place. Masako first met the Crown Prince during their studies November 1986, and since that faithful day, they where seen in several public occasions throughout 87. But family and honour runs thick. Not dealt the most convincing hand of public popularity, would make their relation a challenge. Masako, was the granddaughter of Yutaka Egashira, Chairman of Chisso, a corporation highly infamous for the Minamata disease, a major pollution scandal that occurred in Japan. And with this name bound to her, it made close to impossible for them to marry. However a prince or male, of any sorts that is, fixed on love will chose to see beyond honours and the past. He purposed in several occasion and finally she accepted his hand in the year of 93.

As royalty, a monarchy with no legal political influence, Masako, had to give up her passion for politics. But the point I am aiming for is deeper then the desire of ones wish, it is within the expectations of your country and people, the ones you are there to serve, public opinion and pressure.

Eight year after their marriage, they had a daughter, which blew fire of an old discussion, a lively debate whether the the Imperial Household Law of 1947 should be changed from that of primogeniture (male-preference) to equal primogeniture, which would allow a woman to inherit the Chrysanthemum Throne. It is an old tradition of male hierarchy all over the world, which luckily has ceased to exist in larger parts, but not all.

Princess Masako has remained largely out of the public eye since 2002, reportedly due to emotional disorders, which many speculate is caused by the pressure to produce a male heir as well adjusting to life in the Royal Family. In July 2004, she was diagnosed as suffering from adjustment disorder and is reported to be seeking treatment.
On July 11, 2008, Prince Naruhito sought public understanding for his ailing wife. "I would like the public to understand that Masako is continuing to make her utmost efforts with the help of those around her. Please continue to watch over her kindly and over the long term."

What does, HRH Mette-Marit, Marta Louise and Madeleine have in common?

It is now March and I was just thinking, except being of the same gender, with a royal title starting on P, a surname starting on M, and the same linguistic roots in the N pond… what does M.M.M have in common….????

Two are married -one in a year will be wed, two out of their men has a common job and one of these two should have a blogg tribute to himself, that being out of various reasons.
M.M.M. attains various works on the palaces behalf, one less, one more then the others and one almost lost her rights to the “P” but now performs less the activities bestowed upon her birth. TWO are born into that responsibility while one chose it, as mentioned, one almost un-chose that.

Two have children, one outside, one in a year perhaps two. One has recently been sick soon travelling away; the other one has been away, now just coming home, and the last stayed both “home and away” teaching the skills of believes.

Now that we have played the economical reasoning game for a while, we might find ourselves beaten, to the point that there are no common area for the three… we might be wrong..

However, based on all the news that I within an impressively short amount of time got a hold of, I discovered one thing:

The three of them are taking a lot of criticism from both the conspirators public and the newspapers, in one beating or the other. But they stay headstrong, sharp-sighted woman, deemed to go on.. and with that I bless you.

Happy upcoming 8’th of March, to you and ALL other princesses of any gender out there.

It’s not about music..

Recently, some roomers bounced off in all direction that the Norwegian princess Martha Louise was going to bless the Norwegian Eurovision song contest, with her appearance. Or so at least, we where mislead to believe, - thank you Skavland.
However, out of this tabloid discussion, lead by some of Norway’s most ridicule newspapers (but then again whom am I to speak), emerged another, positively surprising and interesting suggestion by professor Trond Nordby; to have the event hosted by Princess Ragnhild, Miss Lorentzen.

We might ask ourselves, what knowledge of modern pop culture could a princess with the rare knowledge of the early 19’th century, possible contribute with?

Personally, I never thought the Eurovision was really about music, but about the national feeling connected to it, similar to the Olympic Games. -Take away the collective feeling of winning, and we are left with an art project.

So in this sense, in the same sense that thousands of people watch the “new year speech” of the king, -for the sake of national collective emotions, blood, sweat and tears… wrapped in moral words, Princess Ragnhild should host this evening.

Kronprinsesse Victoria Made til Barbie Doll / in norwegian

På en liten leketøys messe i Nürnberg, Tyskland, ble en unik figur avslørt. Det var en Barbie dukke kledd i en strømmende kappe og iført luksuriøse smykker og uerstattlig tiara. Men dette var bare ikke noe vanlig Barbie dukke, men en gjort i glansbildet av Sveriges kronprinsesse Victoria.

Kronprinsesse Victoria som flere ganger uttalt, en moderne prinsesse og en inspirerende global borgere. Hennes utseende er modellert etter hennes opptreden på 2006 Nobelprisen seremonien. Kronprinsessen er forpliktet til veldedige formål, og bidrar til å markere dem som er, mindre heldig her i livet. "Hun er rett og slett et forbilde for jenter over hele verden", sier Rosa Zeegers, Senior vise president for; Barbie International. Å gjør et skille mellom velykket og forsøket, stort nok til å sende SS Titanic rett igjennom.

Kronprinsessen Victoria Barbie dukken ble videre presentert sammen med to andre dukker, den verdensberømte forfatteren JK Rowling og vellykket tennisspiller Kim Clijsters."Det er en hyllest og en anerkjennelse av den positive energien som disse tre sterke kvinner til vårt samfunn. De er sanne rollemodeller for jenter i alle aldre og personifiserer de verdier som Barbie representerer. Enten du er syv år eller sytti år gammel, må du inspirerende rollemodeller", sier Rosa Zeegers.

Uheldigvis for Barbie dukkens potensielle samlere og kongelige fans,
vil Kronprinsesse Victoria Barbie ikke bli solgt i butikkene.
Å vi får se hvilke fremtidige sjikkelser som lar seg videre støpe, inn i den
udødlige verden av plastifiserte kvinner.